When the Going Gets Tough, The Bold Break Free

I stated back in April that I thought this summer would be a tipping point for education. Whether we feel the drastic cuts in school districts, the increases in tuition or simply sense a new pragmatism about what's valuable in this economy, it's clear that  there's a new breeze a blowin' in Learning Land.

If ever there was a time to consider doing things differently, it's now. The tried-and-true path is now a shaky maybe. All bets are off. The old rules are being tossed out the window.

Woo-hoo! Out with the old — in with the bold.

But sometimes tipping points need a little nudge. In the conversations I've had during the book tour these last three months, I've heard a consistent refrain.

Whether I'm listening to a parent of a burned out, prep school student in New York or a parent of an artsy just-want-to-smart-out-and-design public school student in Seattle, the big question always is: Should we break free and do things differently?

Of course, I recognize that every student is different and that it's not possible to make a blanket statement about the best course of action for a kid who is failing to thrive in a particular setting. And I'm not talking about avoiding rigor here — these kids feel restricted and long for a chance to learn in a way that excites and challenges them.

Here's the question I like to ask: Can you picture a learning environment that is exhilarating?

In every case, the parent or student lights up and begins to happily describe a range of positive alternatives, many of which they have already researched and discussed. In fact, in most cases, the family has a great option already researched and a kid who is excited to bust out in a whole new way.

I've been surprised at how readily the solutions present themselves — and then stunned at how strong the resistance is to making a change. The parents know it's a better choice. The kids can't wait to dig in. In most cases, the option they are considering is less expensive than the current one, so money isn't the major obstacle. So, what's the problem?

Well, it always comes back to what I call "fego" — that potent blend of fear and ego that forces us to question whether stepping off the path will irreparably harm our son or daughter and (here's the kicker) whether we might be seen/judged/criticized as a bad parent for trying a different approach.

It appears things haven't quite tipped.

I wish these parents and students could be flies on the wall during the other type of conversation I've had the pleasure of engaging in this summer: hearing from formerly unhappy students who made a bold move that allowed them to soar — and their elated parents who are so grateful they trusted their instincts to allow their son or daughter to head in a more thrilling and beneficial direction.

If only I could put these soaring bold-schoolers in the same room with the struggling old-schoolers! They could connect directly and discover that, yes, there may some bumps in the road while shifting gears, but the benefits of creating a personalized and exhilarating educational path far outweighs the momentary glitches and pangs of doubt.

Students who feel they are the only ones strangled by the constraints of a particular learning setting need to connect with those who have chosen to break free. Everything would shift if only they could hear from those who were bold enough (and had parents who were willing to overcome their fego) in order to forge ahead in a far more fulfilling way.

Of course, it doesn't help that bold-schoolers tend to be low-key about their accomplishments. They're not the ones applauded at the awards ceremonies — they're too busy blazing their own trails (and they're not doing it for the applause, the trophy or the certificate). They're grinning because they are doing it for themselves — that's the key to being an engaged student.

More of that, please.

THIS it the time for parents and students to start asking if there's a better way to give their kids an outrageously relevant education that allows them to engage rather than embalm their brains.

NOW is the time to be bold.

All it takes to embolden us is a rip-roarin' education story or two. I've got a big stash of 'em. Let me know the type you want to hear — I'd be delighted to share.

To read more blog entries by Maya Frost, visit her site MayaFrost.com.